Post-Beer-Week Syndrome: Symptoms and Cures

Partially full kegs after GABF 2013

Partially full kegs after GABF 2013

Another Beer Week has been and gone in the Mile High City. Attendees drank, swigged, and danced at more events and bars all across the Front Range than I care to count. Even the main event, the Great American Beer Festival itself, is still in the long process of cleaning up beer and pretzels not consumed. Let the Post-Beer-Week Syndrome (PBWS) begin.

How can you tell if you or someone you love is suffering from PBWS? Symptoms include an uncomfortable feeling in the belly when looking at photos like the one at the top of this article. Those are kegs of beer that went un-loved and un-drank at GABF. While their ultimate fate is not clear, rumor has it that the contents (that is, craft beer from all across the country) will be dumped, so that the kegs can be cleaned and returned to market. That urge to hold a Kill The Last Kegs party is a perfectly natural feeling in those with PBWS.

Other symptoms include surprise when waking up without a crushing hangover, the urge to make pretzel-popcorn-candy-beef-jerky necklaces, the compulsive seeking of sour barrel-aged beer made with Buddha’s hand and a yeast strain that is heretofore unknown, the irrepressible need to go to every beer bar in Denver regardless of the distance or obstacles, and a renewed attraction to all persons with a beard.

One of the most notable symptoms, the rejuvenation and love of all things Craft Beer, is also the key to the cure. Encourage the individual with PBWS to continue seeking out new bars, beers, and festivals. They should follow up on tips on breweries that are just entering their market and foster friendships with newly-made contacts across the country and internationally. Most importantly, individuals with PBWS should continue to discuss, learn about, and educate others on the ever-growing world of American craft beer.

The symptoms of those suffering this affliction are usually quite clear and unmistakable. Some are listed here, but it should be noted that this is not an all inclusive list. Please note any additional symptoms in the comments. Denver Off The Wagon wishes all affected a speedy recovery.

About Nikki Minette

An uppity minx who loves beer, bourbon, politics, kitties, naps, and Firefly. Tap room bartender at River North Brewery. Follow her on twitter @whiskeynikki.

  • Jennifer Hensley

    I hope you will pardon me if I wax poetic for a moment on the glorious existence of beards.