Come Ride With Us on St. Patrick’s Day!

Oooooh shit, lock up the kids people.  Denver off the Wagon and Star Bar have a float in the 50th Anniversary of the Denver St. Patrick’s Day Parade ON St. Patrick’s Day, Saturday, March 17.  And the best part – you get to ride with us!  Did I mention we have horses?  Pulling a wagon?  With us riding on it?  With YOU riding on it?

Enter our “Paddy O’Wagon Limerick Contest” for you and a friend’s chance to ride!

Limerick Rules (calm down, there are only two):

Post your limerick in the comments section below.  We will announce two winners on Thursday, March 15.

For reference, please kindly enjoy these amazing examples from Jason Jewett (@jindenver):

I once met a girl who liked beer
She imbibed whenever it was near.
But I realized to great fright,
her favorite was Coors Light,
and of her, I chose to steer clear
My favorite is to relax with whiskey,
though too many glasses is risky.
And when I’m out,
without a shadow of doubt,
with the spirit I’m bound to get frisky!

About Michelle Simons

Michelle likes beer, booze, bands, beards and boys. And alliteration.

  • Sandradoran

    I confess I’m a bit of a baddy,
    having played football a’ paddy.
    As goalie for the Denver Gaels,
    I pounded players & Guinness by the pails,
    so now the ginger for atop for your float, I am ready!


    I once stole my brothers stout,
    Boy did he scream and shout,
    He promised a four leaf clover,
    Instead of handing the beer over,
    I gave him a brat with some kraut

  • Andy

    The beer makes me all sentimental
    though truly, it may just be rental.
    I soon think of Bo peep,
    and nod off to sleep,
    then wake up and think, “that was mental!”

  • Chadd Nelson

    On St. Paddys I like to get frisky.
    When I drink the green beer I get risky.
    The more that I drink,
    the more that I think,
    this green beer is just quite nasty!

  • Eric Grzelak

    Denver has a great blog about booze
    On St. Paddy’s Day their float will cruise
    The irony will not me missed
    if a wagon the float does consist
    To ride is an offer I can’t refuse.

  • Jason J

    You can take me to a party at the club.
    Where sweaty bodies writhe and rub.
    But screw the dance music,
    I’d choose to eschew it,
    For a dive bar with a pint and grub.

    • Jason J

       Y’all just got shamed, but rest assured I’m not eligible to win. I won’t even be in town for the shindig.

  • Terry Cabeen

    There once were some whisk(e)y named beer
    In all glasses my hands were quite near
    I did tipped to the mouth
    And then poured ’em down south
    Once empty, did mine eyes shed the tear.

  • Terry Cabeen

    As the limericks below are all turds
    Let us drink to my marvelous words
    You must learn how to rhyme
    And write lyrics sublime
    And re-MEM-ber to AC-cent your THIRDS.
    #Schooled #Challenge

  • Terry Cabeen

    The Saint patties in Denver is tops
    With fine lasses and glasses of hops
    We all dress up in green
    Then get loud and obscene
    But no fear; we’re all drunk as the cops.

  • Terry Cabeen

    If you want to go out on the float
    Write a lim’rick that’s worthy of gloat
    Then pack coolers of beer
    Keep colostomy bags near
    And prepare to get drunk as a goat

  • Michael St James

    ’tis a limerick or a shimerick, to that I’ll raise my glass
    for the cads, the gads, the lads and lasses full of sass.
    We’ll tilt a pint in full gloat
    Perched 3 ft high on a float
    Until the street and we meet, preceded by my drunken ass. 

  • Izabela

    The luck of the Irish is always here

    As we live in Colorado the land of beer,

    So on this day of pots o’ gold and shamrocks

    Make like a leprechaun and put on your green socks,

    Then dance a sexy jig while the sober and boring peeps leer.


  • Rick Ramos

    I want to ride the St. Patty’s wagon
    And sip the suds from the DOW flagon
    Not too proud to beg
    I’ll even hump your leg
    If I remember anything, I’m sure I’ll be braggin

  • Rick Ramos

    There once was  a man from Unseen
    Who had a beer, or seventeen
    He took pictures of Denver
    and drank from June to December
    Then got picked to ride in the DOW St. Paddy’s machine

  • Rick Ramos

    I think I’m competing with Terry
    Whose rhymes are particularly scary
    I guess he can brag
    about his colostomy bag
    but quality limericks? Not very.

    • Terry Cabeen

       I’ll correct your meter. 😉

      I think I’m competing with Terry
      Whose rhymes are amazingly scary (one extra syllable)
      I suppose he can brag (missing a syllable)
      of colostomy bags (meter fixed, rhyme humped)
      But quality lim’ricks? Not very. (extra syllable, apostrophe fix’t)

      You’re welcome, son. 😉

  • Terry Cabeen

    If you want your leg humped, just call Rick.
    If you need him he always comes quick.
    I can’t say that I know
    from experience, though.
    When he’s drunk, all his stories are sick.

    Did you say it’s on? You just got served, son!

  • Terry Cabeen

    For attention I’ve frequently whored.
    And fine bourbons are always adored.
    I write three rhymes a day
    doing shots as I play
    And I seldomly find myself bored.

  • Rick Ramos

    Terry’s a frikken jerk
    Some of us have to work
    writing drunk rhymes
    is taking my time
    At least we’re making Shellie smirk

  • Rick Ramos

    Rocking the limerick slam
    To get on the St. Patty’s day jam
    The Nazi of rhythm
    takes as much as you’ll giv’em
    I’m just trying to get drunk, dude…Damn.

  • Rick Ramos

    As I tip this cold glass to my lips
    Remembering this afternoon’s quips
    I hope I can play
    on St. Patrick’s Day
    and impress the waitstaff with my tips

  • Holly

    Let’s celebrate with green beer and corned beef
    My one request, take your Beano, good grief!
    Wear your beads and cute knickers
    Might I suggest no liquors
    If no one pukes, it will be a relief!

  • Ann

    There once was a lass named Ann
    Who loved to drink beer from a can
    The empty 12 packs
    She would stack
    Until she built the perfect tin-can-MAN.

  • Ann

    There once was a lass named Ann
    Who loved to drink beer from a can
    The empty 12 packs
    She would stack
    Until she created a perfect tin-can-MAN.

  • Bianca Violante

    He said f you grab me a beer
    It’s you that I’ll kiss + call dear
    At this task, she failed
    For his brother, she nailed

    Without shedding a single tear